April 26-27, 01.
x----x
Julianna sat alone in the bathroom, staring at the a little gadget in her hands. She was waiting impatiently for a blue line or a pink line to show up.
Lately she had been sick and had hoped she was pregnant. She had tried to assure herself that she just had the flu, so she wouldn't get her hopes up, but it seemed that the sickness was only there in the mornings. So she was now sitting alone on the toilet, waiting for the indication stating she was pregnant...or not.
She would have told George, but he was away filming and she hadn't wanted to wait until he came back. Besides, she wanted to surprise him if she was.
Julianna sat, holding the home pregnancy test in her hands as she saw the line begin to develop. It was a dull pink, which meant she was not pregnant, and she knew no matter how much she wished, the line wasn't going to turn blue. She sighed and threw the stupid test onto the counter and stood. She made her way out of the room and flopped down on the bed.
Was she ever going to get pregnant?
x----x
"Jules, we've only been trying for two months. You know Alex and her ex-husband tried for 4 years and they still didn't have a baby. We've got awhile before we get worried." George said, holding her in his arms. She had her head buried in the soft gray cotton of his t-shirt. She didn't want to think about trying for four years, let alone longer than that.
"I know." She whispered, swallowing the lump in her throat. He kissed her forehead.
"It'll happen, Jules. Just because it happened right away last time, doesn't mean it will this time."
"I know. I know, I just hate it." Julianna said. She paused. "It's so unfair that when I didn't want a baby, I got one, and when I do, I can't have one." She said.
"Maybe we're trying too hard." He said. She shook her head as she lifted it to meet his gaze.
"Maybe since I didn't want the other baby at first, I was punished by losing him. And so now that I want a baby, I'm being punished because I lost him." She said sadly. George shook her.
"It was not your fault. None of it was. You did not lose the baby because you were scared and didn't know what to do in the beginning. That has nothing to do with it, Jules. You loved that baby with all of your heart, even if you were apprehensive at first. But you are not being punished for anything you did. I don't know why this is happening, but baby, it's not your fault. It's not something you did." He stared straight into her eyes which were watering with tears. "Do you understand me?" He asked. She nodded.
"Yes." She whispered.
"Good. Now c'mere." He said, bringing her head against his shoulder. She burrowed into him and let her tears flow as she clutched to his t-shirt. He rubbed her back and held her tightly to him. Maybe it was his fault because he had said that he never wanted children and he was being punished for that, he thought. He sighed and buried his face into her hair, letting his heart cry with her.
x----x
Julianna was two days late for her period and she was still having morning sickness. For some reason she knew she was pregnant. Even though she had used the same brand of the home pregnancy test this time that she had used the first time, she knew this time it was wrong. She felt pregnant, like she had felt when she was the first time, before she lost her son in the accident. She had bought two more e.p.t.'s of different brands so she could try them both out.....When George got home. She hoped he would be home soon, because when she found out for sure, she wanted him to be there, so they could celebrate together. She was shaken out of her thoughts when the telephone rang.
"Hello?" Julianna asked, picking up the phone in the living room.
"Hey baby." She smiled at the deep warm voice on the other end of the line.
"Hi George." She murmured, snuggling back against the couch.
"Whatcha doing?" He asked.
"Sitting on the couch, thinking."
"About what?" He asked.
"You." She replied, smiling warmly.
"Really? Anything good?" He asked. She nodded to herself.
"Mmm hmm."
"Like what?" He asked.
"I'm wondering when you are going to be home because I can't wait any longer." She said and listened to his deep chuckle that warmed her heart.
"Soon." He replied.
"How soon?" She asked.
"Oh, an hour or so." He said nonchalantly.
"What?" She asked, somewhat shocked, as she listened to his chuckle.
"Surprise!" He exclaimed. "I'm at the airport right now. I came home early to surprise you." He said.
"Yay!" She exclaimed happily. He laughed.
"I'll be home soon, don't you go anywhere." He said.
"I promise." She murmured and could tell he was smiling.
"I love you." He said.
"I love you, too." She replied and they hung up. She smiled with giddiness and sank lower into the couch, barely able to await his arrival.
x----x
Julianna was lying on the couch, the television turned on in front of her and a blanket over her when she heard the door leading from the garage opening. She sat up further and looked towards the hall by the kitchen.
"George?" She asked quietly and watched as he emerged from the hall.
"Hey." He whispered. She stood up, letting the blanket fall onto the couch as she walked towards him. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly. It had been more than a week since she had seen him last. He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed gently. "Mmm. I've missed my girl." He said. She raised her face to his and kissed him.
"George." She sighed his name, her hands on either side of his face. "I love you." She whispered.
"I love you too." He said and they hugged once more.
"George?" She asked, pulling a few inches away from him.
"What?" He asked.
"I think I'm pregnant." She said. She had told him about her test that she had taken two weeks ago. His eyebrows raised. "I'm two days late and I've still puking in the mornings. I feel pregnant, George, like I did last time." Julianna said.
"Are you sure?" He asked.
"Almost. I bought two tests so that I could make sure. I haven't used the restroom for four hours because it said then the tests will have more of a chance of being accurate. They'll be less diluted." She said.
"You haven't take them yet?" He asked. She shook her head and smiled, playing with his short hair.
"No, I wanted to wait for you because I know it, George. I feel it and I wanted you here with me to share it with." She said. He laughed softly.
"What're we waiting for?" He asked. She giggled and turned, taking his hand into her own. He pushed her along quickly and she laughed, rushing up the stairs and into their bedroom.
"I'll be right back." She said. He nodded and she went into the master bathroom, just off of their room. He waited outside, staring at the carpet intently, his mind elsewhere. He wanted to know right now if she was pregnant. God, he didn't have enough patience. His head whipped up as he heard the bathroom door open. She walked out and moved to him.
"It'll take three minutes or so for them to process." She said. He nodded and wrapped his arms around her waist, leaning his forehead against hers.
"I don't know how good of a father I'll be. You know I'll be gone a lot." He said. She nodded.
"I know. I knew that before I decided that I wanted this. I know I'll be doing some on my own. I understand that, George. You have to work." She said. He sighed.
"You know me so well." He said. She grinned and kissed his cheek gently.
"And I love every part of you, too." She said. He smiled.
"Maybe, just in case both of the tests are off, I think we should get a blood test, just to confirm. You never know, we might just have trouble with these home ones. Okay?" He asked. She nodded, trying to tuck her hope away in her heart, just in case. She knew he was warning her because she really might not be pregnant. But she knew she was deep in her heart. She felt it and no one could tell her differently.
"George?" She whispered.
"Hmm..?" He replied. She paused, not wanting to say what was on her mind. So she didn't.
"I think it's been three minutes." She said. He nodded and pulled her away from him.
"Are you ready?" He asked. She nodded and swallowed.
"I think so. Are you?" She asked. He smiled.
"I'm definitely ready. I'm nervous, but ready." He said. She pressed her lips to his quickly.
"Okay, let's go." She said and they turned, clutching each others hands.
"Blue means go, pink means no?" George asked for confirmation. She nodded.
"Yes." She whispered, licking her lips nervously. He took a deep breath and they moved into the bathroom, side by side and their eyes went directly to the home pregnancy tests sitting on the counter. Each clearly showing two blue lines. She turned to him, her eyes wide. He grinned, his smile filling his entire face.
"We're pregnant." He whispered. She squealed excitedly and threw herself into his arms. They laughed, hugging tightly.
"I'm having a baby." She said. He kissed her urgently.
"I love you, I love you, I love you. Both of you." He said. She giggled and he dropped to his knees and kissed her stomach quickly. "I love you!" He exclaimed before clambering back up to her eye level, or a little above.
"You are pregnant." He said. She laughed.
"Yes, I am." She said. He dragged her into the bedroom and picked her up, twirling her around.
"We need to make a doctor's appointment for prenatal vitamins and to see exactly how far along you are." He said. She nodded
"I'll call tomorrow." She said. He grinned and kissed her again.
"I'm so excited and I just can't hide it.." He began to sing, making her laugh as they celebrated their new family together.
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